This time of year I think about you a lot. I guess because it is because of the holiday festivities. Christmas is coming and I know how you enjoyed decorating the house, and spending this time with your family. You were there with us every Christmas. After the presents were opened, Gramma would be coming to start the dinner, and spend the day and night with us.
It has been 12 years since you stopped coming over for Christmas. I miss you. Christmas is not the same. It grows empty for me. Every year I become a bigger “scrooge.”
When I think about you, I remember how it was you who taught me the difference between right and wrong. You loved me as the child I was always in your eyes. Unconditionally loved by you. Sometimes I think that I would not make you proud, but I do know that no matter our differences you will still love me.
Gramma I love you. I always will. You are my role model that I look to for what a person should be. You are loving, kind, giving, and selfless. You are what saints dream to be. You were not perfect, but you were human; that is what I love about you. You had flaws but made up for it in your compassion.
Gramma I pray that you help me not be so hateful and self-absorbed in the holiday season. I ask you to help me enjoy the time with my family. I want to enjoy my nephews Christmas morning. Teach me how. Help me to open my heart. I know I have the potential there. We are of the same blood. You live in me. When I look in the mirror, I see you. Thank you for being my hope. Thank you for listening to your child. One day I will feel your heart again with my head snug to your bosom, and feel you breath. Until I see you in Amenti, I will speak to you in my prayers.
Love your grandson,
December 10, 2007